Let's talk. I've been wondering what is it that I do all day long? Have you? I know my husband has...It seems there is a never ending list in my head of things I have wanted to accomplish since pregnancy. I was too tired then. Now I am not pregnant and somehow the list in my head has grown larger. Perhaps it's not so much in my head as blatantly in my face.
I pat. Pat. Pat. Pat. Pat the butt, pat the back, pat the butt and the back alternating. Pat the butt and back together. Pat fast. Pat slow. Pat solid. Pat soft. Pat. There is no burp to be found in any crevice inside or out on this little boy. I lay him down. Silence. Yack. Yup. All over. Change the clothes, change the bedding. Pick the baby back up. Pat. Pat. Pat. He's hungry. Well, duh, he just yacked his lunch up. Nurse the baby.
(Cute eyes watch me while he eats!)I will get the burp this time. Pat. Pat. Pat. Sniff. I smell baby yack. It's in his hair. Strip the baby, fill the tub. Float the baby who loves the bath. Scrub the baby with gentle lavender soap. Rinse. Warm dry towel. Drain tub. Put away bath soaps. Dry baby. Lotion. Powder. Butt cream. Qtips. Diaper. Poop. Damn. Wipe and recream. Rediaper. Onesie undershirt. Long jammies cause the air conditioning is set to arctic freeze. Pat. Pat. Pat. Nurse. Poop. Sigh. Wipe. Diaper. Nurse. Pat. Pat. Pat. Sleep slowly sinks in. Hallalujah it may be a break for me so I can eat and stretch and potty myself and...slowly and carefully lay baby down. Stand up to tip toe to bathroom. Yack. Turn around and head back. New bedding, new clothes, new diaper for the heck of it.
Pick baby up to recuddle to sleep...sniff. Smells like yack. Back to square one. Forget it. Use wipe, scrub babys head. Now half of his head is crunchy and smells like wipes, the other half is soft and smells like lavender. Oh well. Cuddle baby to sleep. Lay baby down. Poop. Oh for CHRISTS sake! Change baby. Pat him til he's asleep.
Realize I forgot four year old on couch for quiet time....he fell asleep obviously entertaining himself.
Sneak to kitchen, sneak to potty, sneaky sneak sneak. Get some mommy energy. Haha! I am ready for round 2-or is it round 4? Sniff the sweet sleepy baby. He smells like armpit. I so need a shower. And holy cow it's 3pm. Oh well, Will is likely on the way home and he can hold while I shower. He doesn't understand why I want to start another load of laundry. We are out of wipes. He stares at me. I look innocent and go dump the diaper pail into the washer.
That is what I did today.
6 comments:
lkxrpuHi! I'm from MDC and just read your story. Sending hugs and prayers!
Sounds like a normal day with a newborn.;)
~Maggirayne
this is hilarious! if you work full time you wish you were home cleaning yak and poo and if you are home all the time you wish you could dress up in pretty work clothes and high heels and not deal with poo...sounds like a wonderful day!
blissfully normal. who could ask for more?
Now. Imagine that times two. Add in four older kids. Mix in an ear infection and growth spurt.
You have my week! :D
We have no clean dishes and the laundry might be clean but it's also not folded or put away! I did clean the bathroom but only because it was so scummy and gross it STANK!
oh Chantel...I have often thought of you and twins. My Lord...and you're moving too. What else could we add to that mix? You are the real Superwoman!
That was the funniest post I have ever read! Love it! Hurray for happy healthy pooping monster! : )
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