About this time last year...

I woke up from that nap. My boys were playing out side and I waddled to the kitchen for a drink and discovered my water was broken. I had a laugh with my husband this morning. The day I went into labor, he was working with the same employer he is this very day. (He is a general contractor so that's not always how it is) It was also open house night at the elementary school. I will make it this year! And I have two classrooms to visit this year-one in Kindergarten and one in Fifth Grade! And our sweet baby will be in tow...

I just had Ollie on my lap a minute ago. He's so big, yet still so soft and small. So much has changed in the last year. I had gotten him a cup of goldfish crackers and he was sitting on my lap not willing to eat them. Can't let them go to waste. I began to nibble. He shoves his little finger in my mouth and demands I open for him to see. I just have to laugh as now he has great interest in the goldfish crackers. He gets a mouth full and kicks down to crawl out to where his brother is playing lego star wars...he takes over the controller.

I know he will be walking soon. He's growing teeth and hair at an alarming rate. He talks about things, although we don't understand it all yet, he has some things to say! He does say HI...in the most southern accent you ever heard. I've no idea where that came from.

This time last year was full of so much promise. Labor pains and an entire family anxiously awaiting, intrigued by the whole home birth idea. Food and Tea and wonderful relaxing things stocked up in my home for a babymoon (same idea as a honeymoon for those unfamiliar with the term). I knew soon I would lay in my own bed with my fresh-new baby scented-infant, the perfect picture of bliss. We had waited so long, had planned so much and eagerness was thick in the air.

The path we had to walk was not one which was planned. Are they ever really what you plan? Three weeks laden with tests, unanswered questions, frustration, fear, anxiety, a warped world within a world, seemingly heaving by at an astounding rate and yet at times standing still, with muffled sounds and far away voices, people moving as if in slow motion.

What ensued for us was in many ways another three weeks of labor.

What we brought home with us was nothing short of a miracle. A bullet dodging miracle.

It is all still so fresh in my mind. I sit right this minute in the very room, feet from-inches from the very space where he made the transition to become earthside. The very spot where he lay on my chest in the murky waters, blue as blue, and made not a move. My hard work was over, the sweat and agony still lingering in the stuffy and dark bedroom air. And yet my work was just beginning.

In this very room, in this very space, a miracle was born. One that completely rocked my world.
And we still listen to Enya. And we still watch for our trains. And we're planting a Willow Tree in our yard. For some reason God picked me of all mothers to be this little boy's mommy. I won't ever take that for granted. Each kiss and each snuggle has so much deeper meaning-for all my children. I still love him more than all the stars in the sky just as much as I did when we weren't sure of his survival. No, I love him more than that.

And so we walk around on this planet. Spiritual beings in disguise. A miracle and his mom. Doing whatever it is our Creator put us on this earth to do. Together. Today, I am grateful for the opportunity. For the whole ordeal. For the gift of life. Grateful beyond the expressions that words can make. Grateful.