Summer Days...

11 weeks. 3 days. Maybe it was his little blue onesie. Maybe it was the dim lighting in the office. Maybe it was my sentimental mood. I'd like to think not. The low hum of the fan overhead. The warm breeze blowing in the open window. I paused from my emailing and surfing to cradle him in my arms. Wearing just his onesie, I could feel his little toes flaring wide and gripping my arm on the opposite side. I pulled him up close to my face and kissed his little cheek. Then his nose. Then his forehead. He pulls hard on his pacifier and just watches me soak up his lovin. He is so precious I am completely pulled in. He's sleepy. He stares at my eyebrows-which is his normal landing place when he is looking at someone. I lift them up and down and he immediately cracks a big dimply grin right through that paci. And then-he lowered his eyes and looked directly into mine. He doesn't do this often. He held my gaze. It was like looking into the eyes of God himself. There was no hesitation, no looking away, no unspoken cultural rule about rudeness. Just a lock. So blue. So pure. His eyes dilated as I watched. What do you say when you feel you have captivated the attention of someone so pure? "Hey you."(Genius I am) He was present. Intentionally present. No accident. No coincidence. Everything around us seemed to stop, still and silent. He kept watching my eyes with intent. He was...waiting for more. He was listening to me. He was right there. "I love you...I love you for exactly who you are, no matter what...you got that...?" Say something important I thought and hurry, before he stops. What came to mind next-something I tell all my kids from birth. It just popped in my head. "I love you more than all the starts in the sky...more than all the sand on the beaches...and all the leaves on all the trees...and stronger than the rumble of the trains" The last line was a recent addition to the How much I love you's. He seemed to soak in every word, as I carefully whispered them to his intense blue eyes. He blinked. He refocused on my eyes and cracked another huge grin. Like a little mischievous child waiting to jump out from the couch and surprise the adults. I felt his little toes flare on my arm again and pinch me. He turned his head and that was it. He dropped his paci, and we went back to mom and baby, care provider and little one, as I reached for his dropped paci. But for just a moment, I got to peek into an amazing creation. I got to see for just an instant, a flash, the spirit in this little boy. It brings tears to my eyes. I got to tell him to his soul how much I love him. He has so much to show us all. And he is so in love with life. Growing and kicking and shining every step of this journey. It makes me ponder what I did so right that God would chose me for these blessings.

Those intense baby blues.

Now, I would end this post here...but since it's been so long since I put up pics and a good post...I'm gonna give you a phat update! So, not to break that inspirational mood I gotcha in...but to add some kick I will share another pic...my trash...

Okay, Randi has lost it. She's shown pics of baby diapers before, but this one crosses the line...no? So why am I showing you my trash? See that little prescription bottle? It's Phenobarbital. That's right. We're done. Any signs of seizures? Not one. Not a single twitch. No jerky movements. No cycling. No fisting. Just Ollie. Pure and sweet.

Dad administers the last dose mixed with breast milk before the prescription went in the trash!

Now...would you like some pics of boys doing the back yard camping? Okay then, here ya go...

Jacob and Bradley

Ryan

Mister Blink...

Bradley in whats left of the tree house.

My lil Monkey :)

Okay...no, I am not done. Pics of me-as requested...

Other recent Ollie cuddlers...

Bradley...

Uncle Paul...first hold out of hospital...

The mammy-who will hate the fact that I posted a pic of her posed anything less than perfect-even though she is so beautiful. Besides...you're all looking at Ollie's double chin's anyway right? He loves his gramma. She is the only one around here who gets enough sleep to give her the energy to walk him round and round the house when he fusses.

Here is my attempt at catching that dimply grin...

Random and slightly blurry pic of Ryan we caught the other night...it was taken in the dark, thus the blur...he slept all night like this.

And Ollie...right now while I type...

He's not only getting long, but is stretching out now, unfolding those feet from underneath. Soon his basket which I love so much will have to get packed away and he will use his playpen with bassinet attachment...He's just growing so fast. My sweet baby blue.

(((Hugs to all)))

Randi Fay